Saturday, July 08, 2006

Noah Cullen

Noah Cullen: I ain't gettin' mad, Joker. I been mad all my natural life.

The one and only Sidney Poitier in the Defiant Ones. Explains a lot, of course Noah Cullen is mad because he is a black man in the 1950's in the South, and with good reason. However, for different reasons entirely, and I can not say my reasons are even close to being as valid as Mr. Cullen's but they are at least made clearer by that statement. In my case, and as I said, it is not even close to being the same, my anger is not directed at society for treating me both differently and badly because of my race. My anger is more subtle, and probably not as valid. I have the misfortune of sharing Mr. Cullen's geographical location the South. Obviously, the race issues are still around, but my issue is not race but religion. The South is also the Bible Belt, and it is were I was born and bred. Not the greatest of environment for someone with my particular affliction. People in the small town were I grew up go to church on Sunday and Wednesday night, and spend the rest of the week pretending they are holy. It is a lot of fun for someone who does not want to participate. The reaction one receives when he makes the fatal mistake of letting it be known he is "different" is usually not a pleasant one. People decide then and there to pontificate on the ultimate fate of your "immortal" soul. Usually condemning it to the nether regions of hell reserved for heretics. It is a lot of fun having mother's tell their precious daughters not to date you because you are an "atheist." Trust me, I had enough trouble finding a girl near-sighted enough to date me when I was in High School without the atheist tag. It certainly did not helps matters at all. So, just like Mr. Cullen my reaction was anger. Looking back on it I suspect that anger is probably not the best reaction in the world. Cullen is mad because he is black and treated like an animal. His anger makes him look and, at times, act like an animal. He fights back the only way he knows how with his fists, thus completing a vicious circle. I reacted in a similar fashion, brand me an atheist, and I will park myself outside your churches and lob brick after brick at it. Not literally of course, but the effect is pretty close to the same. Perhaps, getting mad was not the best reaction, but I was very young. At the end of the day, what choice did I or the Cullen's of the world have?

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