Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Casualties







The three photos above are lovely pictures of my trophies of war, the war I am waging against Mother Nature (the bitch), and her of her minions, big and small. The carnage you see above took me quite some time, and I think I lost about 5 pounds of water weight while executing my attack. It was, in the main, a success. Several members of Mother Nature's (the bitch) death squad were eliminated, and good riddance to them. I am sure, since it rained yesterday, that her and her minions are even now plotting their comeback/revenge. More power to them, I will be there, chainsaw, axe, or weed eater in hand to meet them at the gates of my citadel. I have mentioned before, and will say again, nothing green can stay. Of course, Mother Nature (the bitch) did leave her mark during this weekend's skirmish. It seems I have got a bit of poison ivy or poison oak (not sure which) for my troubles, but fear not citizens, the Grand Inquisitor is not deterred by such cheap tricks. A poultice has been obtained, and the rash is no longer driving me crazy with itching, therefore, I will continue to prosecute my war against Mother Nature (the bitch). Since there was no one worthy of being a hero today that was actually born today, I decided (decreed more like) that today's hero is a fellow few of us have ever heard of, but who is critical to my purposes. His name is George Ballas, and I have no idea when or where he was born. I have no clue if he is still alive or not, but I do know one important thing about him. It is that one thing that makes him a member of our hero parade. He invented, in the early 1970's, that wonderful device known as the weed eater. The idea came to him as he was taking his car through an automatic car wash, the brushes used to clean his car were the inspiration, and a wonderful device for killing Mother Nature's (the bitch) minions was born. So, for inventing one of the devices I use to continue making my yard Hell's Half Acre, George Ballas (?-?) you are my (272nd) hero of the day.

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