Friday, January 01, 2010

In search of time lost

Furthering my back in time travels today's post would have, in theory at least, been posted on the 29th of December. It would have been to regret that the day in question was short of a hero, and I am sure I would have thought of something pithy to say. However, that was if this blog was on schedule, which clearly it is not, so instead you get some more thoughts on time, and travel. Whilst away on my big adventure last week, I was forced to watch "The Time-Traveler's Wife" awful, just plain fucking awful. I can only hope (for the sake of the author's friends and family) that the book was MUCH better. If not, then I would suggest a career change for that author. The gaping plot/time holes in the movie beggar belief, and anyone with just a modicum of intelligence would be able to point them out. I also had to endure traveling with several hundred of my fellow humans. No matter how jocular a traveling companion may be, after 20 hours of travel compounded with both of you being ill, makes for some tense moments in airports and airplanes. Luckily, everyone survived without too many death threats being made. Also, to my other "fellow travelers" I offer some quick tips. Do NOT attempt to carry on in your luggage the entire contents of your house. One, medium sized, carry on should be enough for most mortals. If you need to carry on seven pieces of luggage, then maybe you should fly first class. And for fuck's sake please do not make matters worse by trying to fit your seven pieces of carry on luggage into space that is built for two. Crushing other people's luggage is just down right fucking rude, but then again if you are carrying on multiple pieces of luggage, you have probably flunked the Miss Manners test in spectacular fashion. I know many of you have (and I suppose love) children, but for god's sake put them on some sort of leash! Not all of us (i.e. me) think that little Bobby blundering down the aisle bouncing into, and off of the rest of us fellow passengers is "cute", and we do not want to be the "adult" that body checks a four year old into the middle of the new year. We do not want to be, but there is a possibility that we will, just a friendly reminder that not all of us are enamoured of your child's foppishness. Finally, (for now at least), try, just try, to remember to have out the proper paper work when you are supposed to, it is not like that have not announced what that paperwork is about fourteen time, or that every TV in EVERY airport has at least four TV's devoted to showing you what items, and paperwork to have out in advance. If you can not sort that out after all of those hints then perhaps you should just stay home and drool yourself to sleep on the couch. All of these are helpful hints for travel, and those are going to have to do because for today (December 29th), there is no hero of the day.

No comments: