Self-Created

As I was shaking it off the other night (no, not shaking THAT off, something else) I came to a sudden horrible realization. That I am both Dr. Frankenstein and his monster. Bear with me here, it will make sense. When I was a mere pup (22 or so) a wise man said to me "the only thing other people cannot control are your emotions" made sense and an idea begin to germinate. Later on in life (25 or so) another saying came my way "control your emotions or they will be your downfall" made even more sense. After a little bit more pondering, I decided to "create" myself. To roll out of my bed one day, and announce to the world ( whom I was positive was waiting with bated breathe for the occasion) I am the Grand Inquisitor, and I do not care what you think (name changed to protect the guilty). This act of self-creation has lead me to the person that I am today (see the post below delineating my faults). All of those flaws or character traits I, for the most part chose, I am a relatively bright bulb. I know the bad traits from the good traits, but I still embrace the bad. I lie to myself and tell myself that I am going to try to "be a better person" but I know I am lying. Obviously, I cannot trust a word I say. I turned myself into my own monster. Remember the monster was not a evil creation, in fact, not a bad dude at all until society decided to shun and reject, then kill him. Hopefully a similar fate does not await me. Luckily for me, I am much more articulate and better looking that Dr. Frankenstein's creation (at least on the outside). I suppose the point of this raving is that whenever I get "down" I should stop and remind myself that you created this "monster" you have to live with it. My only hope is that, unlike Dr. Frankenstein, the "monster" I created is still a work in progress, and that I can tweak it a little to attempt to make it a better functioning creation. Oh, and also unlike Dr. Frankenstein, I do not want to end up at the North bloody Pole, drowning in freezing ass water.