Friday, January 23, 2009

Murder of Crows

Bear with me this is a long story, and it takes a side trip in the middle, but I think it is either very creepy or very cool. It all starts in bed, as most cool and or creepy things do. I had a rougher than usual Wednesday night, and was determined to catch up on my sleep Thursday night. Therefore, according to plan I toddled off to bed rather earlier to snore away the night. In due course off I go to dream land. We all dream or so the experts tell us, and some of us are better at remembering their dreams than others. I usually do NOT remember my dreams, I guess I am just retarded that way. Sometime during the night I woke up, and in my confused state I realized that I had been dreaming. I only figured this out later so bear with me. I only assumed I had been dreaming because I was saying a word that was clearly the answer to some question I had been asked in the dream. I chuckled a bit and thought "wow I wish I could go back into that dream, and give my dream self the answer to the question." Now, this is the aside, and I will try to make it short, but bear with me. I had just finished reading a trilogy of books by K.J. Parker entitled The Scavenger Trilogy. They are very good books, and I recommend them to anyone looking to read about 1400 pages of interesting fiction. I have to give some detail of the books in order for my dream sequence to make sense, but I wont give away too much. The main character in the books loses his memory. He wakes up in a stream surrounded by dead bodies with no idea how he got there or who the hell he is. The rest of the books are sort of his journey to discover who and what he is. Eventually, he meets a fellow that tells him they were school chums together, and begins to fill in the blanks. It seems the main character is from another continent from where he woke up, and his school chum tells him that he always talked in his sleep in his native tongue which no one could understand. The main character would always wake up and say that he had been dreaming, but could not remember his dreams (sometimes he would shout in his sleep, and the others would wake him up, and he would say that he had been dreaming). The school chum tells the main character that he suggested the main character try to put something in his dream that he could focus on that would help him remember his dreams. I know odd, but hey this is fiction after all. The main character for lengthy reasons picks a crow as his memory device, and is able to understand that now when he sees a crow (and he sees a lot of crows) he is dreaming and should pay careful attention if he wants to remember.
That is the aside that I needed to veer off into in order for the rest of my story to make some sort of sense. When I awoke from the first dream, I did not really remember many details. The details of the first dream only came to me later after I had a second dream. However, I guess the books had more of an affect on my mind than I realized. When I woke up the first time, and after I realized I was answering a dream question, I thought "maybe I should put a crow in my dream to help me remember." I chuckled a bit and rolled my goofy ass over and went back to sleep. Along comes the second dream of the night, and it was a real corker. I will use italics to record those details so this already rambling post does not go over the edge. I apparently had been recently married by proxy to some lady that I had never laid eyes seen before. Not only had I not seen this woman, but I had not even seen a picture, photograph, artist's rendition, or portrait of her. I have no earthly idea why I had married this woman, or why she was such a mystery. I figured she was hideous or had a humpback, and I was being punished for my sins. I travel to my newly minted bride's parents estate, and blimey it was a PALACE . There were these two huge pools (sadly it was pissing down rain, and therefore, no obligatory bevy of bathing beauties, it seems my dreams sometimes suck). I am introduced to the parents who seem happy to have me as a son-in-law (a clear warning sign to my dream self that the woman must have a hare lip or something really wrong with her). I then meet a girl that people indicate is my new wife, I take a gander and am not too horribly disappointed. She does not have any clear deformity like an extra arm or anything. She is a little chubby, but I am in no position to deny a woman a little meat on her bones, she is not Orca fat, and looks pleasing enough. However, she is encumbered with a child, some little toddler that is running around screaming like all toddlers do. This appears to upset my dream self quite a bit (as, to a lesser degree, it would my conscious self, I am not a fan of children). My entourage, which for some odd reason consists of people I knew in high school, and have not laid eyes on in real life for over twenty years, does not seem too upset at my situation. Me and my "wife" are duly introduced to each other, and the wedding feast begins. (Leave it to me to skip the sex part, and go straight to the food part, bollocks my dreams stink, no wonder I do not remember them). At the feast everyone seems to be having a wonderful time, I guess feasts are like that in dreams. Somewhere about the third course I look down and realize that I am wearing one of my real life suits. This shocks me horribly because my "work" suits are not fashion statements. They are fairly cheap suits I buy because I have to wear one at work, no Armani here. Well too damn late to change now, so back to the feast I go. It seems my new in-laws have some sort of estate in the Azores islands that I think is to be my wedding present. Things are looking up it seems, rich in-laws that live in luxury, and my very own "estate." Perhaps this is worth a slightly chubby wife with child included. Even better news follows, it seems I have been put into the in laws will, and they appear to be fairly old people. Much joy for me! (What this says about my real life self, I really choose not to think too much about). The will? Me? The heir apparent? More wine! Sometime around course four, I think, even better news it appears that chubby girl is NOT actually my new bride. This puzzles me a bit until I am informed that she was a "test." Seems I passed without even knowing it, and was not sure why I was being tested. It seems that the real bride is a real stunner. (Although I never actually see her in the dream, damn and blast). This is also good news, and clearly a reason for the feast to continue. However, this is where the dream train goes off the rails for good. Suddenly I am alone in a room with a girl I went to high school with, and have not spoken too in over 20 years. Odd, but hey this is a dream. We begin to catch up on "old times" and chatter away about nonsense for a bit, and then I wake up. No big deal end of dream time to stagger out of bed, and go to work. I was surprised that I was able to remember this second dream in such detail, and while I was getting ready for work the details of the first dream began to come back to me as well. I did not think too much of it until suddenly while I was in the shower the name of the girl I had went to high school came back to me. It took a few seconds I got her first name pretty quickly (and I will not divulge it just in case she is alive and does not want to be slandered). Repeating her first name a couple of times jogged my memory enough for me to remember her last name, and this is what I think is the creepy/cool part. Her last name is/was Crow.


tideliar said...

Aside from missing out on the shagging, aren't dreams fucking great?! How your mind went through all that, to get where it did, over something so (to the conscious) triffling. And it felt like the dream lasted for hours, but may have lasted but moments in "real" time... I love the brain...

Cynnie said...

thats great!..I fucking LOVE that post.

the best dream i ever had was one where I was fucking a giant pink bunny ( It was a bunny costume , and i know it was a man..but the costume and the man had become one)
and I woke up having an orgasm !
those are the best dreams :)