A late but happy christmas

Clearly, I am not a fan of the holidays. Ask people that know me fairly well, and they will tell you that Scrooge does not have anything on me when it comes to the "humbug" department. Until I am visited by four ghosts, and suddenly see the light I will remain the "humbug" fellow that I am. Even then I would not be so easily convinced, as much as I drink, random ghost sightings or visual hallucinations are part and parcel of some of my more vivid dreams. Sadly for me and the literary community, I do not write epic poetry while I am in my drunken stupors. However, this christmas was not as bad as usual. I did manage to beg off of going home, and spending "quality" time with the parental units. Perhaps they have finally ascertained that "home" it where ever I happen to be. In this case a house that I can barely afford, and can not give away, i.e. sell for anything but a bag of chips. The "home" that my parents wish me to go back to is a very small, very shitty, little town called Gleason (pop. 1,463). It is a poster child for one horse towns. In this day and age that would equal to being a one stop light town. Not a red light, that would be too fancy, and more than the budget could bear. No we have a stop light, just one bulb, one colour, thank you very much. Being bore, bred, and educated in such an environment did not produce the witty, sophisticated, well spoken fellow that at least three people read, on occasion, on this blog. No I managed to obtain the benefits of a classical education both on my own, and quite by accident. So, I would quite expect that the majority of those 1,463 people's imagination would boggle at the list of my christmas guests. Of course, for their safety no names will be doled out, and who can blame them? To be counted among my friends, and my christmas guests could be considered a slander that would require an immediate lawsuit. Either way the list included one Swede, one Scotsman, an Englander, and later an Aussie. I was the only U.S. citizen at the table, not like that is a badge of honour, and I was also the person with the least amount of education. Considering that I spent a decade in various and sundry post-secondary school, and have the massive student loans to prove it, that is no mean feat. Lots of food was consumed, lots of drink was consumed, and a poker game or two broke out. Apparently everyone had fun,and no international incidents occurred. No one got too terribly mad at another else, and no one tried to punch anyone in the face (unlike my usual christmas experiences at "home"). International relations were quite pleasant, and we even managed to stagger out to a bar without any violence, of course it helps that we did not invite any Irish.