Saturday, February 25, 2012

The Antidote



In certain circles my last post was a bit 'unnecessarily cruel, and rude.' This post won't be cruel or rude so it seems I am making progress. However, I would not go so far as to say it is going to be all sunshine and lollipops either, but you take your chances as they come.

The above photo is of one of the BEST xmas gifts I have ever received. I received it this xmas, right on time, not a week late, and it rocks. It is, as you can tell, a watch. Something I had been without for a very long while, and therefore the person giving this as a gift was spot on in their picking something I would need, use, and want theory.  Before I received this excellent gift, I used my cell phone as my way of telling time, and it was quite annoying to a lot of people around me. They always thought I was being rude by checking my phone while I was in their company. It was not usually me doing anything but checking the time, but it made a few people upset. It also became, an annoying habit even to me.

It is a pretty nice watch, and unlike the world's worst gift it was neither cheap nor it is cheaply made. Not that price is what matters, it isn't. I was born poor, raised poor, and will probably die poor, therefore price matters but not in the way one would think. Just because something costs a lot more doesn't make it a better gift. In fact, a watch of a similar price as the world's worst gift would have been just as stunning of a gift, but that ship (I suppose) has sailed. I wear it daily, and I get a great deal of use out of it. I have all but stopped the annoying habit of pulling my phone out of my pocket just to check the time, and I try not to check it for anything else if I am 'out' with someone. It has been a struggle breaking that habit, but I am winning that battle (slowly).

Of course the higher the price, does (usually) mean the higher the quality, but after all it is a watch. It has one purpose, to tell me the time, I don't need a ton of bells and whistles to tell me the time, just the time will do. I am (in more ways than one) a very simple man. I don't need overly fancy shit. I find it to be a bit pretentious, after all once a prole always a prole, and proles don't (by definition) wear or own a whole lot of fancy shit. Simple things to do simple tasks is usually the prole way, mainly because we can't afford any better, but after a while we just convince ourselves that fancy shit is a sign of decay, and we don't want to decay, now do we?

The person who bought me this wonderful trinket knew (and still knows) every little bit of the information I am painstakingly sharing with you via this blog post. It isn't overly complicated, and it isn't rocket science. That person didn't have to ask anybody (or bodies) else what would be a good gift for me, they just saw that I didn't have a watch, when directly to a store, looked at the watches on display, and picked out one they figured I would like. They even kept the receipt just in case they had made a poor choice. Which is a pretty good idea, just to be on the safe side, one never knows when a salesperson is going to steer you wrong.

 I've been told the whole process from beginning to end took about 20 minutes and that was because they stopped to eat a pretzel.  Simple, easy, and right on the money as far as a good gift, hard to believe such a miracle is possible considering the other gift I received this xmas, but there the watch is on my wrist, a constant reminder that when someone puts more than 5 seconds of thought into giving someone a gift, they can get it spot on. Who was this gift giving genius? This person that knew exactly what I wanted, then proceeded to, with precision the German army would be proud of, go and obtain this marvelous gift, well I figure his identity is pretty obvious. It is me. To me, for me, from me. The best gifts usually are.




7 comments:

Anonymous said...

The post is rude since you keep repeating how bad the other gift was. As if you didn't say it in that last post, but you did. If you wanted to not be a prole, or rude, you would find a better way of writing.

Anonymous said...

Rude is just his "charm," if you could call it that. I'm tempted to buy him a shitty gift just to see how much attention he gives it!!

Anonymous said...

charm is like a habit, better after a while than at first?

Anonymous said...

I love Bulova. I lucked up on a new one on ebay for $50. It must have been stolen.

Anonymous said...

And I thought that you didn't DO Christmas. Boy how times have changed. Well, I reckon I've changed a lot too lately.

The Grand Inquisitor said...

gift giving, especially to one's self is not 'doing' christmas. I can give gifts just as easily on the non-holidays of the year. how have you changed a lot?

Anonymous said...

Yesterday, a gentleman whom I work with/against daily expressed some concern for my safety. He asked, "Do you have a handgun carry permit?" I said, "No" He said, " Why not? These people are dangerous. I don't see how you do it. You need one. I'm gonna get myself one" I replied, "If I obtained a gun, I would probably just shoot my damn self; besides I wanted one a couple years ago, but a coworker of mine forbade me from obtaining one. He vowed to never share a work space with me if I had possession of a firearm." He said, "What? Did he think you were violent or something?" And he laughed like it was the funniest shit he had ever heard!